My Town - if you don't like the drivers get off the sidewalk

Winnipeg is an enigma to me. I have lived here all my life and it still baffles me.

On one hand we are a very tolerant and giving people. We continually lead the country in per-capita charitable donations. We embrace our multiplicity of cultures through annual festivals such as Folklorama or the Festival du Voyageur. We were Canada's first city to elect an openly gay mayor.

Why is it, then, that when most Winnipeggers get behind the wheel they lose all comprehension of common sense, courtesy or intelligence?

I had company over this past week and spent much of the time driving (in a snow storm most of the time) from one end of the city to another, from Transcona to the airport and from the North End to Richmond West. And, let's put it this way - no one area has a monopoly on stupidity.

There were the usual offenders - the ones who put their signals on, then don't turn, or those who put their signals on once the light turns green (as if they don't want us to follow them). There were also the usuals who thought running lights were sufficient illumination against the endless waves of snow and slush. This weekend also had people who would pass on the right hand side, their vehicles weaving in the slush embedded against the snowbanks on the side of the streets, only to slide to and fro before able to safely(?) get by.

But the most prevalent morons last week were those who thought starting their car and running their front wipers were good enough for them to get going in traffic. It's as if they thought their electronic rear window defroster would be powerful enough to evaporate that two inches of rock-hard crystallized ice resting on their car. And who needs to see left or right? Just blink your signal once (got to extend the life of that precious turn signal bulb, you know) and move - the SMART car will back off.

But the King of the Bewildered this weekend had to be this one gentlemen I saw whose plate number I could not get because like his windows, headlights and taillights, the license was covered in snow. He pulled up to an intersection, stopped at the red light and rolled down the window to throw out his cigarette - and all this time he also had his shoulder resting against his ear, embracing his cell phone so he could talk, smoke and drive all at once without the need for vision.

Take your act to a Big City like Montreal, New York or Paris, oh talented one, and see how long you last.

Here's hoping Darwin was right.